And I've spent years making up excuses for pain you've inflicted
During these years I read myself verses of forgiveness in efforts to let go
And even when I went blind from nights spent with eyes strained on these pages, I rubbed fingertips against braille as if with each stroke the pain of your actions would hurt less
You see I've spent more time trying to forgive you than I have loving you
and I have spent more time loving you than I have loving myself
and through all of this I made promises that it would be worth it because you would be here for me unconditionally...
Yesterday you proved me wrong.
I spent nights with eyes strained, reading verses of forgiveness. Tonight I am done trying to forgive. I am tired and i just want to sleep.
